Review: The Coincidence of Callie and Kayden by Jessica Sorensen

Title: The Coincidence of Callie and Kayden
Author: Jessica Sorensen
Genre: New Adult
Publisher: Sphere
Published: August 8th 2013
Page Number: 400
Rating: 4/5

 

Summary:

 

For Kayden, suffering in silence was the only way to survive. If he was lucky, he could keep his head down, do as he was told, and make it through the day. But one night it seemed like his luck-and his life-might finally end . . . until an angel named Callie appeared just in time to rescue him.

Callie has never believed in luck. Not since her twelfth birthday when everything was taken from her. After the worst was over, she locked up her feelings and vowed never to tell anyone what happened. Now, six years later, she continues to struggle with the painful secret that threatens to consume her.

When fate lands Kayden and Callie at the same college, Kayden is determined to get to know the beautiful girl who changed his destiny. Quiet and reserved, Callie still fears letting anyone else into her world. But Kayden is certain that Callie has come back into his life for a reason. And the more he tries to be a part of her life, the more he realizes that, this time, it's Callie who needs to be saved . . .  

 

REVIEW

 

I've actually had a bad experience with a Jessica Sorensen book in the past, so I was very hesitant to start The Coincidence of Callie and Kayden. But I'm so glad that I gave Jessica another shot because I absolutely adored this book.

 

From Page 1, us readers know that this book isn't going to be the happy-go-lucky type, but the tear-your-heart-out type, and I really loved that. The writing immediately captures your attention and drags you into the messy lives of Callie and Kayden. You grow to love all the characters chapter by chapter, and by the end of the book you are completely rooting for them, cheering them on from the side lines.

 

I mentioned earlier that this story was incredibly dark and I have to warn you guys of trigger moments, because the book deals with depression, rape, self-harm and abuse. And while I know these are difficult subjects to bring up in general, but Jessica did a very good job on portraying them. I knew exactly how Callie and Kayden felt because I've been in their shoes before. Not with rape or abuse, but with depression and self-harm. It was one of the darkest times of my life and seeing it through different eyes was so refreshing. So thank you, Jessica.

 

While I loved my time reading Callie and Kayden's story, I have to admit that there were a few times where my eyes rolled and I sighed in annoyance. In places the story became over dramatic, and the fact that everyone around Callie and Kayden suffered from dark pasts just wasn't believable. But I'm still super excited for the next book in the 7 book series.

 

 

 

Buy the book (Waterstones) | Buy the book (Book Depository)

 

 

The Fights of a Teenager - Depression

As most of you guys can tell, I have been away from my blog for quite a long time and it's not because I've fallen out of love with blogging or reading, it's because I have relapsed. Again. Back in 2013 I was diagnosed with Severe Depression after a long stint on bullying.

Since 2012 I've been battling with Depression, but it took me a year to finally go and see the doctor who could officially diagnose me. And while I not always down and glum, I still feel different on the inside.

A few weeks ago, I did something that changed my whole world again. I began to get suicidal thoughts and just wanted to throw it all away. My family. My friends. But most importantly, my life. Attempting suicide isn't new to me, back when I first came out I tried to commit suicide twice before finally telling my parents that something was wrong with me. And while I have changed over the years, everything felt the same. I felt like I was back to my 16 year old self, who had no confidence, hardly any friends and was just in a hard place. I didn't see a way out and while I feel like I can talk to my family, friends, you guys, I just didn't want too.

My life has always been hard. It's not like it's scarce. But when you're dealing with suicidal thoughts everything bleeds away and you find yourself trapped in your own mind. My life became my death and I hated that. But I can't force myself to get better, just like a drug addict can't force themselves to get off the drugs. It has to happen naturally.

"Faking a smile is so much easier than explaining why you're sad."

Right now I am not 100% myself.

I took time off to get better, but I've only gotten worse. I'm still active on facebook, twitter and instagram but that is it. I don't really talk, it's just an update here and there and I feel like it's time you guys got to know why.

At the minute I'm still on my break and sadly will be for another 2 weeks, but someone from Hodder publicity got in contact with me asking for my review of a book they sent me. A book I've read and have yet to review because of my break. And while I feel like I should review that book ASAP, I also feel that I need to focus on my own life and get better all round.

Being a reviewer for such amazing publishers is something that I can only thank you guys for, and I have every bit of respect for the publishers and the people who work there, however, it would be nice to have my life taken into consideration. My review policy states it can take up to 4 weeks to get a review on the blog and that's not changed since I've started. So, yes, I will get the review up of the books I was sent, but they'll be uploaded when I am back from my break.

If I come back from my break.

I'm not crying out for attention. I never have and I never will. Who I am is who I am, and I love myself. Nothing can stop me, but Depression is a life long battle, one that I will continue to fight while you all live your lives.

I hope you take into consideration that I am trying my hardest to recover and get back up on my feet and that I won't be not reviewing the books I've been sent. They will get a review at some point.

Now, have a good week and I'll talk when I'm back.

Depression: My Story

1 in 8 teens suffer from depression

Now I've never spoken about my life really. But being only eighteen you may all think that I've had it all easy, because that's what it's supposed to be when you're young; you should live your life, having fun, going out with your friends, getting drunk, etc. I am not like that and never have been.

One of the biggest things of my life is my depression. It changed me.

My story of depression started when I was fifteen years old, I came out as gay. Many people would say that it was a brave move coming out as having an attraction to boys when they go to an all boys school, I'm sure it was to some people, but to me it was all about being happy. I felt like I was in constant pain because I wasn't being myself, so when I let it out I felt like I could finally be myself and be happy at the same time.

At first the boys in my school appeared to be fine, but they weren't. It took them all three weeks before they started name calling me and it became very clear that they wanted to make my life hell. Every day, all day for months on end, they could call me Faggot, Bender, Freak, Gay Boy and those don't even seem bad, but for a fifteen year old who was like a new born baby and soaked up everything, it hurt. A lot.

After a few months of life torment, the verbal abuse became physical. I was never punched, kicked and assaulted, but they did start pushing me into walls, tripping me over when I walked past and threw food and cans of pop at me. There's only so much you can take before you explode, and when I did and told the teachers nothing was done about it because I didn't know the names of the boys. I could've pointed them out to them, but they wasn't interested.

At one point during this, I, myself had started to change.

Not on the outside, but inside. I was feeling hate towards myself, wanted plastic surgery to change everything; my nose mainly. But it wasn't just that. I started to snap at people, they could be nice to me and I'd want to punch them in the face. My concentration had suffered and I started to isolate myself from everyone. My life diary was wake up, go to school, come home and go to bed and I'd come out when everyone was in bed. I was a complete recluse, I didn't know who I was. 

Everything took a complete one-eighty when a boy in my year at school threatened to slit my throat open. He was known for taking drugs and for being very violent, so when I told my school and they did nothing, I felt like I was in no way safe there. I lost all respect for the teachers and I never felt safe there, in fact when I was doing my A Levels I was so scared to go in there that I sometimes faked I was ill and couldn't go.

The second time my depression came (mine comes in stages) it was when I came out as my alter-ego: FiFi La Femme (Now Azalea-Lee). People didn't understand it and if I am being honest, I don't think I truly understood it. I wasn't questioning my sexuality, I was also questioning for gender. I tell no lie when I say this, I did love wearing female clothes, makeup and wigs. I felt beautiful and confident. I had never felt that.



During this stage of depression my life really did change. I began to self-harm. I couldn't control the pain I was feeling, so taking a knife to my wrist made me feel in control. When they stopped working I went and started taking medication. I was already on them because of a ear infection, but two pills every four hours went to me taking, on average twenty - twenty five pills. I was faking I had a ear ache, toothache or stomach bug and my family believed me. However, I was never thinking of what I was doing to myself. (I'll tell that part later).

I'm not ashamed to admit that I have tried to take my own life. Your mind just goes around and round and then when you have a chance you take it. I wrapped a rope around my neck and started to suffocate myself. I did stop, I always did, but the option was always there. Always in the back of my mind.

When I went to the doctor, she diagnosed me with Severe Depression and I was made to go and have a blood test due to over-medicating. It turned out that I had damaged my liver. I was on the edge of a mental breakdown. I could've cried because I had did this to myself. I was to blame, no one but me.

Everything ended in December of 2013. It's September 2014 now and I still have urges to cut. I'm not happy with myself, but I am learning to control that. In fact I have started to think about applying for NYU to study Journalism. I already have a place in University for next year, but I want more out of life and moving to New York feels right for me. I'm also planning on getting a nose job when I turn twenty-one.

I've not over medicated since everything happened, I take them responsibly now, although the temptation is there. I am very proud that I have suffered with depression because it's made me into who I am today. I'm a strong minded person who wants better out of life. I'm also confident in knowing who I am and there is not one thing that people can say that will put me down.